Ah, The Yankees

Over the winter the Yankees went on a spending spree

And they invested a ton in the special three.

C.C. Sabathia signed for a lot is all I can say

And he's 1 and 3 with 4.85 era.

A.J.Burnett also signed for a pile of dough

But his era is 5.40 and we all know

C.C.and A.J. will have to move Heaven and earth

For the Yankees to get their money's worth.

Mark Teixeira signed as a slugger so how'd he do?

So far he's a loser- batting .182.

Yankees fans hope the team gets back on track

When the mighty A Rod finally comes back.

So there is only one thing to say if one must

And it's this-the Yankees so far have been a bust.

Ode to Corruption

When it comes to corruption I gotta say
If Memphis isn't # 1 we're not far away.

We have a state senator in prison for Heaven's  sake
And a lot of cops who were on the take.

There are elected officials who really feel
That winning an election is a license to steal.

And now the County Clerks office made us look like fools
They were caught taking bribes to subvert the rules.

The City Council got back in the corruption game
They're pointing their fingers at Barbara What's Her name.

There is a report that as more investigation nears
Barbara is in it up to her ears.

Some cynic is sure to say-have no fear,
It's just the way we do business here.

If that's the case I'll say Great Caesar's  Ghost
The end  is near  and we're all toast.

A Hockey Poem–One Last Time

I wanted to write a hockey poem but to be precise
I couldn't think of a word to rhyme with ice.

Oh, there's nice,mice and twice but I'm so dense
Neither of those words makes a lick of sense.

They have a penalty box and you know what they say,
Here we go again-it's the power play.

And it's almost a lock,a dead certain bet
That someone will say-it's in the back of the net.

And I know for sure that the jig is up
When they begin to talk of Lord Stanley's cup.

So, I'm not a hockey fan and now you know why
It has gotten so bad that I no longer try..

I remember Coach Kirk saying-it's a lot of bunk
I never go to  a game where they cannot dunk.

The Red Sox–My A.L. Favorite

The New York Yankees really looked inept
When they went to Boston and were-Great Scott-swept.

In the first game an ol Bucco named Jason Bay
Homered off Riveria and that saved the day.

The second game was a slugfest, lots of  runs scored
But at the end of the day we had 5 more on the board.

The third  game would be tough and if we were to get it
We'd have to beat their ace-Andy Pettitte.

The game was a thriller but I really feel
It was a steal of home that sealed the deal.

Hey-we have 11 in a row and I feel this way
We play 'em one at a time-that's all I can say.

Two at at time would be a whole lot of fun
But to the best of my knowledge it has yet to be done.

So go Boston Red Sox-fight-fight-fight.
And let's take care of business every night.

And to poor 'ol Mason this word from Jack
You'll do much better when A Rod gets back.

I Love My Buccos

An optimistic Pirates fan is a humble guy
He knows his team's history and still wonder why;

He has positive feelings about the current season
And in sipite of eveything he knows the hidden  reason.

The pitching is much better he will likely contend
Our starters won't break but they just might bend.

And our bull pen is just exactly what we need,
We can count on them to hold a lead.

And our hitters have heeded the manager's call,
For Heaven's sake you guys-keep your eye on the ball.

So if our pitching is better and the hitters too
What's a long time Pirates fan to do?

We've come out of our shell-we're bigger and bolder
And I gotta tell you-we've got a chip on our shoulder.

We hope the Cardinals are Cubs  are literally struck dumb
So look out National League-here we come.... 

Willie Herenton - One More Time

There is a report that King Willie is feeling the heat
And may just run for the 9th District seat.

Steve Cohen,the incumbent, must feel under the gun
Because against Herenton his chances are slim and none.

Now, east of Highland you could pretty well make book
That Willie is considered just another big time crook.

We know he's being investigated by the FBI
But so far he's come up high and dry.

And each passing day finds his fans delighted
That once again their boy has not been indicted.

So will he run or won't he, no one knows for sure
But getting him the heck out of Dodge has a certain allure..

Ode To Mason

Your team has precious little chance of winning
When the other one scores 14 in the second inning.

Yankee haters had their biggest day
When Cleveland lit 'em up just that way.

But the Indians weren't  done I'm tellin' you
Because they ended up scoring twenty two.

Yankee fans sat in disbelief and despair
Ah, but here I won't even try to be fair;

I was delighted and wanted many more
I jumped up and shouted-run up the score.

I can just imagine Mason there in the stands
With tears in his eyes and his head in his hands.

Woe is me he cries we're under a Satanic curse
And that Eaton loves it makes it that much worse.

The Grizzlies - What Next?

Once again the Grizzlies are lottery bound,
And it's not like they're on unfamiliar ground.

When it comes to losses,we really got 'em
And once again we'll finish near the bottom.

Their record is terrible and that's a fact
They were the 5th worst team to be exact.

Mr. Heisley says there'll be better days in store
Of course he's said that several times before.

There are a couple of things that would fix us quick
One would be to get that coveted # 1 pick.

But they'll still be spinning their wheels in the mud
Unless they go out and sign a free agent stud.

So just once you guys rise above the NBA crowd
And let's make Coach Gene Bartow very proud.

The 'ol coach has problems as we all know
We're praying for you Gene-so go-go-go.

Cal and COGIC - Outta Here!

Calapiri and COGIC are leaving and I must confess
I could not possibly care one iota less.

Calapiri showed his true colors-he said he'd stay
Then at night he silently stole away.

COGIC griped too much for us to abide
What they wanted amounted to a low price ride.

St. Louis heard their demands to promised to deliver
So the COGIC Saints are now headed up the river.

When Cal returned recently I don't know what he knew
But instead of one bodyguard Great Scott he had two.

So now that they're gone as I said I don't care
And I hope the door did hit 'em you know where......

Kenny Perry is From Kentucky

When Calipari left Memphis like a bolt from the blue
I asked myself is there nothing that I can do?

I thought of two things,so which is worse,
I'll become a UT fan or apply the Jack Eaton curse.

I chose the Curse and I will not lie
If you're not from Kentucky it does not apply.

So yesterday Kenny Perry had the Masters in tow
He had a two shot lead with two holes to go.

So I put him under the Curse and suddenly I knew
It worked-Hey Kenny how'd you do.

So Cal is under the Eaton Curse and I'll tell you man
For two games at least I'll be a Tennessee fan.